Friday, July 17, 2020

Taking a break from the serious stuff.

It's Friday.
This week has already lasted 5 months.
Everyone is stressed and I don't really feel like arguing with anyone.
Don't be starting something.

I'm more passive aggressive anyway.
And when I see people starting to get heated in confrontation, I usually walk on by...

Today, I'm not going to be serious.
I'm not going to be worried.
I'm going to laugh instead.
Here's some of the stuff I've seen recently that made me laugh.
For those of you that contributed to these funnier moments in my day, thank you!
For anyone else that needs to see them and laugh, you're welcome.

That's all I got.

Thursday, July 9, 2020

Speed Bumps Ahead.

Well, aren't we in a pickle?

Things are so far from "normal" at this point - we don't really WANT to know what level of Jumanji is up next.
Welcome to the Jungle, baby.
LOVED the movies, but this is rather getting out of hand...

Now that I can finally find toilet paper at the store again, you best believe I'll be buying a pack each time I go. What, with the bubonic plague raising it's head up in China and all.
No sir, not that again. And "they" say it's not a high risk. Isn't that what "they" said about the current pandemic initially? And look where we are now: over here customizing our face coverings to match our daytime pajamas.

Yes, it looks like a highly isolated, singular case but in this day and age, you have to weed out the fake news from the real news.
I'd rather not even watch the news. I remember, waaaaaay back in March, every day at 4PM, I'd turn on the news to get the daily Coronavirus update from the Govnahh. I can't even remember when I stopped turning it on at 4PM, and it hasn't been on since.

Jeopardy! gives you more knowledge anyway - why not watch that instead?
Roger LOVES it when we watch Jeopardy! together. I guess all the answers.
All Of Them.
Even if I don't know the answer. And my FAVORITE answer is always, "Who is Walter Cronkite", and I've even gotten an answer correct with that one ;)
Roger didn't even know who Walter Cronkite was. He clearly, does not watch any news.

So much has happened already this year that I'm afraid to list the things (for fear of leaving something out) and I'm afraid to wonder about what comes next.

Murder hornets would have been enough to do me in with my already raging fear of insects.

Glad that one didn't pan out.

In other news - my brain is over here in overdrive, trying to prepare for all worst case scenarios.
I guess it doesn't help that I'm reading a post apocalyptic series about a massive EMP that wipes out the entire world's power. Yeah, may even be making things a bit worse. I've already started buying matches, batteries, candles, canned goods, bleach, cooking oils, a cast iron pan and adding new things to the list every day. Y'all - I can't help feeling that we need to be ready for crazy times.

It is an election year.
Seems like EVERYONE and EVERYTHING seems to get more heated as the summer temperatures rise. Racial tension, protests, boiling points of frustrations are reaching peaks, scandals, these are uncertain times, indeed.

What else is my brain doing right now??
Glad you asked!
I'm working from home so I'm essentially in my head all day long. At any given time during the day, my mind is on ANY one of the following::

  • why are you reaching for that bag of chips? you're not even hungry.
  • coffee
  • the school situation looming over our heads with a roll out of some kind of beginning next month
  • face mask vs NOT wearing a face mask. Let the arguments commence. Oh, and you've added a nice little source there I see you've sited. That's great. 
  • do you know anyone that actually has tested positive for COVID?? I do now. Several actually.
  • I don't want to get sick.
  • do NOT put your hand in that bag of chips!!
  • trying to limit the time my child is on electronics (how can I send her outside when there's murder hornets?)
  • working from home while an 11 year old is trying to get me to "keep her occupied"
  • trying to figure out how to keep our kitten out of her water bowl because she thinks she is SUCH an awesome puddle jumper. I have paper towels all over the floor to prove it.
  • all of the president's televised news conferences (I might have watched a few of them - each time I do I say to myself at least once, "Did he just say...????"). I think he improvs a good bit.
  •  it's lunch hour - GO. Get your butt on that treadmill and give me 30!! 
  • take a shower
  • brush your teeth
  • where are all these fruit flies coming from??
  • what is everyone else doing when life isn't what it used to be?
  • is this the week for recycling?
  • where did I leave my pen? Is this my cup?
  • where do all the cups and forks disappear to?
  • keep up with the laundry, dishes and bill paying 
  • did I check the mail?
  • what day is it? (every single day)
  • wondering if all these crazy events are ushering in the next coming of Christ. Pray, y'all.
  • do I have enough toilet paper?
  • Don't you DARE reach for that bag of chips!
  • conspiracy theories.
  • fact checking - what's real? who is posting all this fake stuff?
  • looks like it's gonna rain.
  • did I take my BP meds today??
  • getting on a plane to fly to Idaho at the end of the month
  • is Milli in her water bowl again?

And my husband STILL comes home every day from work and asks me what I have planned for dinner. Um... uncertainty. That's what's planned.
You feel like chicken tonight?

Wednesday, May 13, 2020

Coasting along.

One month since my last update.

For the last week I've been on autopilot.

Just moving through the motions of every day life, not forgetting to breathe, blink, sleep, wake, because those are natural processes.

What's NOT natural?

Last Thursday, we took our tiny little cat to the vet to be spayed. Milli has been in heat like 3 times and she's maybe 10 months old?
Barely even 5 lbs. She's itty bitty.
Well, I'm thinking the anesthesia was a bit much because the past 6 days have been horrible.
Healing, trying to keep her from licking her incision, first 3 days nothing but puke. Unable to keep ANYTHING down. Another $200 trip BACK to the vet over the weekend. Trying to keep her from jumping up on things. Lethargic, miserable, hiding wherever she could get herself into.
She's finally playing, eating, drinking, getting back to normal only threw up once today.
I won't do this again. I don't know why it's weighed so much on me this week but it's taken SO much out of me.

Literally. All day, Erry day.

Wanted to go see my sweet momma on Mother's Day but I couldn't leave the cat alone because someone had to have eyes on her every minute when she was puking every hour. And this kitty has pretty much stuck herself to my side. If I'm in a room, she's practically underneath me.

How's quarantine going for you?

I know - the country is trying to get going again. Everyone is opening things up. Venturing out. Braving the masses in this huge world.
I'm over here just being content in my own little world. I even try to shower every other day. Sometimes I even brush my teeth and remember to take my medicine. I don't have to go out unless I have to go to the grocery store and even with that, Roger will swing to the store and get stuff on his way home if he's able.
Masks are so smothering. They give me panic attacks.
Then, I see people being interviewed on news reports with their noses uncovered and think, "You're not doing it right" because seriously?!?!? Not helping your situation or anyone else's.

The only other thing I've ever had a panic attack over is sleeping in a car with 4 other people when we were supposed to be camping but it rained. DOWN-POURED. It was hot, sweaty, humid, suffocating, I felt like I was breathing hot, other people's breath air. It got me good. I'm not a fan of camping.

If this is part of our "New Normal", this adjustment will be one I do not want to embrace.

Its crazy.
Conspiracy theories are running rampant.
Everyone has an opinion.
Everyone has their own set of moral standards as to how we're supposed to face this.
It's still here. I'm still working from home.
There's still not a solution.
I'm so tired of watching the news.
No one needs to hear any more panic inducing headlines.
Meat shortages. Where's the toilet paper?
What will school look like in the fall?
Are we going to work from home forever?

one day at a time.

But those days are running together and tumbling over one another like water flowing over rocks.
I have to write it down to know what day it is.

Hailee's school 5th grade year is winding down.
This 3rd Distance Learning packet is the easiest yet. And thank the LORD for that. I don't know how much more 5th grade math I can struggle through. Not the math itself - but the arguing with the 5th grader over why she's trying to make it harder than it actually is.... you get me/??
But fractions were never my strong point either.
I can honesty say I've only had to "help" her with 1 of the assignments.
She literally rolls out of bed, comes down stairs, grabs her packet, picks through the bingo squares of assignments (for each class) one she wants to do for the day, gets it done and goes back to her room.
Life with a PreTeen, man. It's a doozy.
This year. Homework = read for 20 minutes each night.
It was hard to know what she was learning and how to help her since it wasn't something we've been working on together all year. and I am NOT a teacher.

I'm a nurse.
Still talking to my "patients" (we call them members in our insurance world) every day.
Still Rolling with all the changes coming down the line. Charting what they want. Trying to get assessments done on time.
Still available for all the questions and needs that arise.
Still love it when they end the conversations with "I love you!" because you can never get tired of that.

It's not like being stuck at home is hard.
I'm good with that.
I think it's more of the "what's next" and trusting "the powers that be" to do what they think is best for us.
Government with a bit more control than I'm comfortable with?
Maybe. And I'm not a very political person.
This is very different.
This is almost as suffocating as wearing that damn mask.
Not that I want to get out there and be a social butterfly because I'm not.
But maybe a little interaction with someone that isn't a post-op kitten or an 11 year old.

Roger put a beautiful little pond in our back yard. He worked his butt off and I'm proud of how amazing it's turned out!!

My parents came over a few weeks ago to bring by Hailee's Easter Basket they put together for her. We stood in the garage, walked to the back yard, just hung out for a bit.
I cried. My emotions bubbled right over the edge when I thought about NOT hugging my mom and dad. but you best believe I hugged them. (I'm getting a huge lump in my throat just thinking about it)

I don't want to be scared to hug my parents since they don't live in my house.
I don't want them to be afraid to come into my house. (I know they're not because they're my parents)
I don't want to be afraid of getting close to people.
I'm ok with working from home but what is going back to the office going to look like?
Or going to my "member's house"?
I don't think we're ready for a vaccine.
I don't know what comes next.

I've never had emotional issues with depression or anything like that but recently, the feelings of UNmotivation, not wanting to do things, feeling like there is so much expected of you with no time to get everything you want to get done accomplished, not knowing what day it is, putting things off till the last minute possible... that's all there.
Bed times, bath times, meal times are all over the place.
Social media is SUCH a double edged sword!
Yeah, you want to stay connected to everyone BUT - there are so many people with pessimistic, condescending, negative, smart mouth comments, belittling, hypocritical attitudes... I just can't.
This is real y'all.
And maybe needing a bit more adult conversation and interaction than I'm currently getting.
We all do.
Does anyone else feel like this is totally drawing itself out to be such a long winded situation?
One you get exhausted just thinking about?
Or is it just me that's over it and it's only really been in our faces for 2 months?!?

Love y'all.
Mean it.

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